[ Thursday, January 23, 2003 | 5:35 p.m. ] "The clock is your enemy." - MFCF's 'Your First Week of UNIX' Guide

More ick! [ Monday, January 20, 2003 | 3:30 p.m. ] A few minutes ago I was sitting at my computer, and I thought, Truly, there is nothing in the world as divine as cold, sweet Coke. I proceeded to grab a can from my mini-fridge, and after a couple of wonderful sips, I felt... something vaguely solid. It was certainly thicker, more viscous, than what I was expecting. I had once left a can of fruit spritzer with a little left over at the bottom in my bedroom for a few days. When I went to dump the last bit of liquid in the sink before throwing it out, a fair-sized blob of mold came out. I could've thrown up, since I could've just as easily decided to slug back those last few drops and ended up... Christ, I don't want to think about it. Let's just say that the whole business freaks me out. This can of Coke, however, was not something that had been sitting open on my nightstand for a week. I'd just opened it seconds before. I tried looking in the can; while it's pretty dark, I didn't see any really nasty floaters. I think there's actually a possibility that the more solid bits that I felt were partially frozen. It seems a little extreme—I didn't think my fridge got that cold—but possible and not gross. I'm voting for the ice. I'm just afraid to try it again.

And now... [ Friday, January 17, 2003 | 2:22 p.m. ] What's your Hogwarts House? What colour are your wings? What's your Inner European?

[ Thursday, January 16, 2003 | 4:05 p.m. ] Oh God oh God oh God!! I just saw a large, silverfish-like insect crawling up my corkboard wall. V1 has suddenly lost a little of its appeal.

[ Thursday, January 16, 2003 | 1:19 a.m. ] Another day, another evening of wasted opportunities. This time I gorged on V1 "American spaghetti", talked to Sean for an hour, and then spent three hours reading back issues of mathNEWS on the web. Great time management, kiddo. You know, that MATH 239 assignment isn't going to do itself, or, better still, just disappear, never to be heard from again. Sometime before Friday, you will have to do it. Even if you don't get all of it, 50% is better than 0%. But for now, an observation. It's been strange coming back here, knowing people, and yet not really knowing them at all. I see all sorts of people around campus whom I recognise, even many whose names I know, but I don't actually know them, nor do they know me. I see them in lectures, like David, who I sat beside in MATH 135/137 tutorials first term, and two Adams whom I worked on CS projects with, also in first term. I see them at Subway (Alicia, again from CS) and at Harvey's (Vicki, from HC, sort-of). And I never, ever talk to any of them. Then there are the people I know from online. The only one I've ever talked to, online, that is, is Gordon, and I've never once seen him around campus. There's Yada. I've been reading Yada's weblog regularly for quite some time now—since 1A, I think. I see him everywhere, from walking randomly around campus, to sitting in front of me in my lectures. I lived in the suite right next-door to his in King this summer. I even received an e-mail from him once, which I never replied to because I'm lazy and horrible with those kinds of things. In all that time, however, I've never once talked to him. I've never said, "Hi, I'm Terri. I sometimes unintentionally stalk you." But perhaps I shouldn't say that. On an unrelated note, I feel like doing a Bridget Jones moment. "I choose vodka. And Chaka Khan." Unfortunately, I have neither vodka, nor Chaka Khan. The closest I can come to vodka is Rev, which contains it, and to "I'm Every Woman" is maybe "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" or "I Will Survive". Well, at least the online community is something. I can read about other people's experiences that are similar to mine and feel, in some small way, like I'm not alone here. There's Yada, whose Good Will Hunting picture I loved (he seems to have taken it down, so I can't link to it—thank goodness I saved a copy for myself), and this chick, whose comments about the girls in CS amuse me tremendously. (Strangely, my 251 lecture is very balanced, gender-wise. 241, on the other hand is about 80 guys to 10 girls.) I worked one of the same co-op jobs as Josh. And there's Dinah, whose page I just found, and is of slight interest to me because she lives four doors down and one corner around (which is not quite as catchy a name for a band as "3 Doors Down") from me here in res. Aw, crap. It's one o'clock in the fucking morning. Now I don't know whether I should try to work on the combinatorics for an hour, or just go to bed. I'll stay up for at least half-an-hour once I'm in bed, playing games to fall asleep, anyway, and I've got class at nine thirty. Plus I didn't shower/stayed in yesterday's clothes today; ideally, I should fix that for tomorrow. I suppose I can work in the 1 1/2 hour break between my classes tomorrow, and that'll still leave an hour after my last lecture to go to the Tutorial Centre, if I'm desperate. Not that I'll go, anyway. I stopped asking for help half-way through first term, and I haven't gone back, first out of laziness, and then out of pride. Whatever. I'll do it tomorrow. I mustn't forget who I am. I am a procrastinator. I live by the motto, "Why do today what I can do next week, or not at all?"

[ Wednesday, January 15, 2003 | 12:53 a.m. ] I noticed something last term. That is, I can't work for two evenings in a row, unless it's absolutely necessary. For example, I worked yesterday night, and, therefore, I just couldn't seem to work tonight. If I had something due tomorrow, I'm sure that I could pull myself together and do it, but my next assignments are due on Friday. I was able to do a little something in the morning, before class, and I stopped by the labs for a few minutes right after class, but after that I just lost focus. For the rest of the evening I... spoke with Sean on the phone (1 h) ate dinner (20 min) turned out the lights & watched Milkdrop, a Winamp visualisation plugin (1.5 h) downloaded endless programs & plugins (4 h) During that time I listened to Rush's Hold Your Fire so many times that I thought I was going to lose it. I later switched to Permanent Waves, but it was still too similar. I need a more drastic change of pace. [Okay. Test For Echo doesn't seem to be working either. Well, I suppose it's OK.] But that's not what I wanted to talk about. Plus, I'm trying to keep from rambling. I want to keep my post length down more. I find it much easier to read several small, focused posts than one long, meandering one with the same information. Also, if I try to keep my posts shorter, I should actually finish and post them more often, instead of accumulating more and more outdated blogn.txt files. I should stop with this explanation now, shouldn't I? So, to sum up, today's mostly been a bust. On the academic front, I did one question on my CS 241 assignment, plus printed out the MATH 239 assignment and skimmed it over. On the social front, I had brief conversations with two pseudo-acquaintances, Selma from HC, and El's friend Chris, who is in my CS 251 lecture. This is worth mentioning since my usual contact with other humans is almost exclusively over the phone with Sean and my parents, or, on rare occasions, old pals like El or Kim. I'd really hoped to do some work, though. I ph34r MATH 239. (I see sigma-notation and my brain just disconnects.) And finally, in an homage to Jacq, I ask myself, what now? Homework? I'm too sleepy. Call mom or Sean? It's too late. Respond to e-mail? Too much effort. Stare at Milkdrop some more? Too much of a waste. Eat cookies? Too piggish. Read a novel? Too much thought. Read a textbook? Too boring. Finish old blog posts? Too much recollection. Play games? I'm too jittery. Sleep? Tomorrow will come too soon. I suppose that leaves lying in bed and clutching Snuggly Bear, Jr. tightly. Of all the things on my list, it should be easiest to play some games. Then, after a little while and whether I like it or not, I should just drift off to sleep, (not) ready for tomorrow. 'Nite.

[ Monday, January 13, 2003 | 1:53 a.m. ] Fabulous. I've completely wasted a day that I could've spent working. The only things I accomplished were writing part of a blog entry and taking innumerable online quizzes. According to theSpark.com, I am currently 66% pure.